Testing Adult Authority

Toddlers test adult authority during the twos stage

and in the teenage years too...

 It can be trying on a parent when a toddler utters, "I hate you!" while tears stream down her face when she can't get what she wants.

It  hurts, because they are such powerful words!

  After all, you only wanted to help her take the snowsuit off.

Toddlers learn early words that work and use them to control their world. They are smarter than you think!  Just like your teenager...
Remember when...
They want to be independent and they want things, NOW!

Your Teenager is no different at testing your authority!

And...No easier to be controlled.
Children learn early from TV, friends and family what works and use it to exert control over their world.

They're angry because they want to hangout with their friends until midnight.

He asked to stay out tonight, I suspected that he was hanging around kids that play around with drugs and alcohol.
I told him to be in by 10'oclock and stay away from the bad stuff. 
He's only 14! 

He said...

"I'm not listening to you, shut-up...

I can do what I want!

Teenagers want to be grown up, but they have to take responsibility for what they say!

'After all you only want him to be safe.'

If they say hurtful words to You they have to be held accountable!

Don't go over excuses in your head why this is happening...

 It is happening!

Nip this habit now, it's never too late.

• Tell your child it is disrespectful and hurtful behavior.
• Give him the consequences if he does it again 
• Leave the room.
• Talk to him after he cools down.
• Do not attempt to explain the whats, whys and so on and so on...
• Look into his eyes, firmly and kindly say... 

"Disrespectful behavior will not be tolerated in our home and I need it to stop now. 

If it doesn't stop, there will be consequences for this behavior."

A little Reminder... 

It is hard at first for both parties, but this is exactly the time your child is testing you, just like when he was a toddler...
Don't let his age and size break you down.
Always gesture or say you love your teenager when things cool down.

Consequences 

• Make a list right now, of consequences you can give your child on a moments notice when he tests your adult authority and limits.
• It's always good to give a consequence that goes with the behavior, but sometimes just taking away something for a couple of hours until she has apologized is all you need. 
• Make two columns, one for light behavior consequences and one for heavy behavior consequences.
• More on Consequences coming soon!