Peer Pressure and Drugs Teenagers

As soon as your kids leave the house in the morning you don't know what they will get into.

I wonder to myself, "Where did I go wrong?" I feel like I've given him every thing a mother could give...I feel as though I've failed.

This often can feel deeply personal, but has no bearing on you at all.
Kids embark on drugs from many reasons.

The number one reason they start drugs is because of  peer pressure,  kids don't want to be singled out.  

They're not thinking about you and how you feel, they're thinking about how they fit in.

The only one that shares your teenager's feelings and understands what they are going through is their friends.

You can say you understand, but they don't hear you or believe you.

Friends rule right now! 

 What can you do about this?

Don't react to the unbelievable.

Meaning if you've just found out your teenager or child has been using drugs or alcohol.

• Hold back and listen to how it happened.

Don't give out the consequences quite yet, because you really want to think about what to do.

• Hold back from punishments and think about what your child needs to learn.

Talk about fact that they may be curious about drugs and alcohol and you will not allow this kind of behavior.

• Hold back and just state, "You have abused your freedom, so you will have to make this up to me."  Write me note and explain what you should of done instead."
• Tell him that he has crossed the line on the limits set in this household.  Caution! Too much opposition is something you do not want, so both parties should turn away and cool down if things get heated.  
•  It's good to let him know what  the consequences are if this happens again. An example of a consequence: Take away two days of freedom with friends.

Toddlers run towards the road when they play.

They know there are rules not to go on the road, but they get so involved with playing and they forget.

• So...You set up boundaries, because the consequences could be deadly. 

You build a fence and keep on talking to your child about how dangerous the road is.

• They learn and the fence gate gets left open...Your toddler doesn't leave those boundaries, because you have educated him well.

Do the same for your teenager and educate.
Let him know the boundaries and what happens if he crosses them, so he won't be surprised.
Your teenager has no fence, but will remember what he has learned.

Dealing with Peer Pressure and Puberty

Life is tough!

You really don't remember do you?

Dealing with your own peer pressure and puberty and trying to find who you were on the inside-out, with a zoo of people outside telling you how to be...

He told me I was ugly today!

It can be very daunting for a teenager to say the least.

You're wondering who your child is...
You're child  is trying hard to figure this out.

{Somehow telling me I was ugly today was how he had to figure  things out! I never thought I would hear those words from him! he used to play with my nose when he was 2 and tell me how much I was a 'pretty Mommy' I'd fall asleep with his music in my ears...

Almost brought me to tears today...I want my 2 year old back!}

That teenage adolescent body is feeling insecure...Remember? 
Figuring out who your teen is...is remembering what is going on the inside.
Your teen is saying inside himself...

I'm not good enough

I'm too shy

Too short

Too fat

Too skinny

Too ugly

Not cool

Not smart enough

And as you watch your bumbling teenager walk by with his friends, pants pulled down low, you keep on thinking to yourself.  "He's not my child, he's not my sweet little Booboo anymore!"

 Your teen who once was a good example and felt good enough, decided the "good example thing" isn't good enough for right now.

That bouncing baby girl or boy has moved to another stage and body.

She's decided that she needs to look out for herself.

Saggy pants, tight jeans or too much makeup.
Your teen will figure it out.

Tomorrow will be yet another story of... too much of this and too much of that...

As far as I know there aren't too many grown ups with saggy pants and underwear peaking out the backside.

Next time your not happy with the way your teen looks, unless your going to a wedding or formal...

Zip up the comments and tell him how it really is.

It really is---just-that...I love you!

It really is...